There's Nothing Like You And I

Okay, please still comment about the soundtracks, but here's a little something I found that I wanted to fill out.

Ten things you wish you could say to ten different people...

10. I'm sorry I call you at the most inappropriate times. I'm sorry that I can't seem to stop thinking about you subconsciously. I wish I had made different decisions and taken a chance instead of being terrified of ruining our friendship because our friendship ended up fading away anyways. I'll admit, I was jealous of every single girl you dated. And not because I was protective or some bull shit like that. It's too bad that things will never get sorted out. I wish they could.

9. Why did you treat me so horribly? I was always there for you through absolutely everything. I was the one who took care of you at parties when other people would leave you on the bathroom floor or say they weren't your "babysitter". I deserved better and I hope you know that.

8. I miss you. I miss you so much. I can't even express my feelings for you in words. All I know is that you've been there for me through so much and I couldn't ask for more from anyone. I miss talking all the time. I hate that we haven't seen each other in a year now. I hate that we might not ever see each other again because who really knows?

7. I don't know what happened to us. We used to be best friends. We did everything together and always talked. Then out of nowhere we just stopped talking. Stopped hanging out. It hurts that I'm telling the truth right now and I really wish I wasn't.

6. Sometimes I feel like you only want to be my friend when I can give you something. Or when you want to get close to someone that I'm extremely close to. We don't ever talk anymore and we used to have hour long conversations nightly. I miss that, and I miss our friendship. I hope you love the city and that you're thriving. And I hope even more that we can somehow go back to what we used to be.

5. You made me feel lonely. I included you in every single thing I did. No matter what, I always invited you. But you never invited me to anything. It was like you wanted to push me away and that really hurts because I was there for you through so much. But there's nothing we can change now.

4. We grew apart. It was bound to happen, but it still makes me sad to think about it. We were so close. I never thought a guy could really come between two friends like that. But you seem genuinely happy and I am happy for you. I wish both of you the best and the happiest ending anyone could ask for.

3. You really are my best friend. We fought all the time when I was little, but the minute you went to college things changed. We started to get closer. Then you moved out just before the start of my freshman year of high school. I was lost without my big sister there, but it still brought us even closer. And I expect you to visit me as soon as an opportunity presents itself.

2. I barely know you. But I cannot believe just how well we get along. I love spending time with you and I can see that we're going to be great friends. I wish we saw each other more though, you know?

1. I always liked you. Even though you were dating one of my good friends the entire time, I liked you. You made me get butterflies in my stomach. Being around you, thinking about something you said, all of that made me blush. And I know you liked me too. If you didn't then you sure acted like you did. I've since gotten over those feelings, but I never told you and I wish I had. Not even while I still had them, just sometime.

Nine things about yourself:
9. I'm a lot sadder than I seem.
8. I love living in a city.
7. I am not as talkative and loud as I used to be.
6. Sixth grade changed my life and not for the better.
5. I know that I will one day teach myself to play both guitar and piano.
4. I only have one real regret.
3. Other than the above statement, I don't believe in regrets.
2. I am trying to be a positive person.
1. I realized just how lonely I was when I was still in Harrisburg. Even when I had "friends".

Eight ways to win my heart:
8. I know this sounds cheesy, but you must love dogs.
7. Care about the world.
6. DO NOT let people walk all over you. And don't be afraid to stand up for yourself.
5. Be able to sustain an intelligent conversation.
4. But be able to act like a kid too.
3. Make me laugh. And I mean really laugh.
2. Love Spiderman.
1. At least have an appreciation for all art forms; music, visual, theatre, fashion, culinary...I really do mean all art forms.

Seven things that cross your mind a lot:
7. I wish things had been different and I hadn't been so afraid.
6. I wish I had chosen the reunion instead this summer.
5. Am I good enough?
4. Am I pretty?
3. Am I thin enough?
2. Why am I always "one of the boys"?
1. I wish I was in New York or Paris.

Six things you do before you go to sleep:
6. Facebook
5. Pajamas
4. Whitestrips
3. Wash my face
2. Brush my teeth
1. Listen to music

Five people that mean a lot at the moment:(Now this is just the first five people who pop into my head, so don't be surprised or offended. And they're in no specific order)
5. Katie
4. Rita
3. Kevin H.
2. Kevin W.
1. Me, for once

Four things you are wearing:
4. Black boots
3. Skinny jeans from Old Navy
2. An all black tuxedo style shirt
1. A black and grey vest

Three songs that you listen to often:
3. When Your Mind's Made Up - Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova.
2. Can't Go Back Now - The Weepies
1. Nothing Like You And I - The Perishers

Two things you want to do before you die:
2. Have success in the field I've always dreamed of
1. Be happy again

One confession:
I'm not as confidant as most people assume I am.